You are The Dragon!
You’ve managed to get this far on charm, good looks and your ability to make a killer cocktail. But you know that if you want to go further, you’re going to have to do some actual work (eurgh!). In order to minimise the amount that you’ll need to do, and maximise your time for shenanigans, you’re going to need some new tricks.
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The Dragon is Alice’s best friend. He’s currently 12 feet tall, purple with luminous green eyebrows and very long claws. He uses his claws to break things when he’s supposed to be doing jobs. That way he doesn’t have to do the jobs.
He’s inordinately lazy, rude and teases mercilessly.
He comes from money (well, a stash of gold, at least), has no idea of the value of anything, and he’s very good at pointing stuff out to Alice, especially when she needs to be told something she doesn’t want to hear. He’s extremely smart, but would rather blow smoke rings and drink gin than think – or do anything, actually.
Occasionally he has strokes of genius, which he gloats about constantly.
He’s also Alice’s biggest fan and would die for her. Just no-one tell her that, ‘K?
BTW, the reason he’s 12ft tall now, rather than his original 120ft is that he wound up the Witch one too many times, and specifically when she was trying to play her favourite first-person-shooter game. She lost out on the all-time high-score, he lost out on 108ft of height